It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize