please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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