idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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