I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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