for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
