I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
