I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
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i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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