doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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