i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Dear god my vagina.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
