have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I think my fart just growled at me.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
