oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting