even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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