i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize