I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
