so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
