Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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