No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Randomize
