Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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