I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
There was a lot of him and a little penis
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
