i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
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