everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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