her vagine was all disorganized.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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