Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
