Whoa Z and x make the same sound
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
