She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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