PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
