haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize
