I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
