I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
