I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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