She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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