the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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