I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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