Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
