4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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