My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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