oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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