covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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