I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
