So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i think i have herpe
just one?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
