just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
The adults are the big ones right?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
