He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
