I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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