doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Vodka?
Forever.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
