Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
accomplished twins. life is a go
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Blood and glitter go together right?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
