My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Do you remember whose house we're in?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
