I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
