Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize