have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Randomize
