You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
