I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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